This is my first time blogging since I relocated to HK to work. It is also my first time having to relocate to another country to work on my own, without my love, my family and familiar faces from my hometown. I have a lot of mixed feelings and I find that bottling it up on my own in this foreign land makes me feel even more stuck. So, here I am, to get my feelings unstuck and also hope that this sharing with whoever will read this post will help in sort of way.
I have been here for 1 month. People always tell me it takes time to adjust, first few months will be tough, oh what an understatement.
It is such a big change. The air is different, the currency is different, the people are different, the language is different, the food is different. Everything is different. This is all great when you are travelling and exploring. The tough part is when you know you would not see the familiar things and people in your life for a long time.
Past 1 month, I felt so tired. Getting used to new colleagues, new office, new environment. I was also busy looking for accommodation that is not too crazy small / crazy expensive (which in HK, most are). I miss my family, I miss my boyfriend. Sure, I skype with them everyday. It helps to maintain the connection. But whenever we end the call, there is this sense of emptiness that seems to fill the space. The virtuality of the connection through skype is amplified by the quietness that fills the small space of my house here. Initially, I fill the emptiness / quietness by switching on the tv / play videos. Although I can pretend that it eases the sense of emptiness, but deep inside, I am grieving and the sense of emptiness never left. It just get buried underneath and bottled up, waiting for the volcano to erupt.
I feel so lonely. I feel like running home. But I cannot. Not till 1 year later. I can only shed tears alone.
What about you? Are you feeling homesick and missing your loved ones too?